Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Phone Call

On the way to Grandma's funeral visitation, I got a call from my OBGYN. He told me that the results from my blood work had come in and the baby tested positive for something called Trisomy 13. He told me that he and Dr. Scott (my high-risk OB) both thought it was a false positive because the baby looked absolutely perfect (with the exception of the bright spot on the heart) and normally with babies that have trisomy 13 there are severe deformities seen on an ultrasound. He said they would like for me to do have an amniocentesis done and that Dr. Scott could see me tomorrow. I told him I wouldn't be able to meet with her until next week, because my grandmother had passed away.

At first I thought even if the baby has this why would I risk amniocentesis? I know it is considered a very safe procedure but still it made me nervous. I thought... well, I had about a million thoughts. I have never thought I could terminate a pregnancy, but if the baby was only to live and be in pain until it died, how could I be ok with that? That felt selfish to me. I sent an email to my family and a few friends asking for prayers of wisdom and clarity as we tried to make the decision for what we would do.

Today was my appointment. Dr. Scott met us in the ultrasound room. She said she had called the genetics people and asked what the probability was that this was a positive result. 13%. We talked about what might have caused it to come back as positive and a whole bunch of other stuff. She left Patrick and I to decide what we should do. I had gone into the appointment pretty certain that I would have it done and feeling good about that decision, but when we were told it was 13% correct we both felt like the procedure wasn't worth the small risk of miscarriage. We talked with the Dr. again and even saw the baby on the ultrasound and both she and the ultrasound tech commented on how perfect everything looked. We set up another appointment for a couple weeks out to have another ultrasound. Dr. Scott said if at any time I changed my mind we could always do the amniocentesis.

We feel good about the decision we made. I have a new understanding of women who have to make hard decisions regarding their babies. It isn't a complete understanding, just a new dimension.  Life is hard, and for some it seems impossible.

Today we are so thankful that all seems to be well with our little one. Life can change in an instant.

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