Sweet Slumber

8 year-old Wisdom

Talking with Will the other day about the baby

      "You're about to have 4 kids...that's a lot of responsibility."

 So so true, oh wise one.

Phone Call

On the way to Grandma's funeral visitation, I got a call from my OBGYN. He told me that the results from my blood work had come in and the baby tested positive for something called Trisomy 13. He told me that he and Dr. Scott (my high-risk OB) both thought it was a false positive because the baby looked absolutely perfect (with the exception of the bright spot on the heart) and normally with babies that have trisomy 13 there are severe deformities seen on an ultrasound. He said they would like for me to do have an amniocentesis done and that Dr. Scott could see me tomorrow. I told him I wouldn't be able to meet with her until next week, because my grandmother had passed away.

At first I thought even if the baby has this why would I risk amniocentesis? I know it is considered a very safe procedure but still it made me nervous. I thought... well, I had about a million thoughts. I have never thought I could terminate a pregnancy, but if the baby was only to live and be in pain until it died, how could I be ok with that? That felt selfish to me. I sent an email to my family and a few friends asking for prayers of wisdom and clarity as we tried to make the decision for what we would do.

Today was my appointment. Dr. Scott met us in the ultrasound room. She said she had called the genetics people and asked what the probability was that this was a positive result. 13%. We talked about what might have caused it to come back as positive and a whole bunch of other stuff. She left Patrick and I to decide what we should do. I had gone into the appointment pretty certain that I would have it done and feeling good about that decision, but when we were told it was 13% correct we both felt like the procedure wasn't worth the small risk of miscarriage. We talked with the Dr. again and even saw the baby on the ultrasound and both she and the ultrasound tech commented on how perfect everything looked. We set up another appointment for a couple weeks out to have another ultrasound. Dr. Scott said if at any time I changed my mind we could always do the amniocentesis.

We feel good about the decision we made. I have a new understanding of women who have to make hard decisions regarding their babies. It isn't a complete understanding, just a new dimension.  Life is hard, and for some it seems impossible.

Today we are so thankful that all seems to be well with our little one. Life can change in an instant.

Laura's Baby Shower

I got to host a baby shower for my sweet friend from high school Laura Jennings Stoner. This is her first baby and she and her husband are going to be just the sweetest parents. Mo took care of all the decorating and made everything beautiful. Miranda and I did the cooking and other odd and end things. It turned out so beautiful. Love getting together with these girls  ladies! It's always full of lots of laughs and walks down memory lane.

Our Baby!

Conversations this morning before taking the boys to school:

Will: Jack, today Mom will find out if she's having a boy or a girl!"
Me: Will, we aren't finding out. We are waiting till the baby comes."
Will: What?!?!!! 

hahahaha

I had my 20 week ultrasound today and we got to see our sweet baby! We stayed strong and didn't find out the gender. It was easier than I thought it would be. Everything looked good with the baby, but there was a small echogenic intracardiac focus on the heart that is sometimes seen in babies born with Down's Syndrome. So my doctor is wanting me to have a more in-depth ultrasound with a high-risk doctor in about a week. That is a little nerve wracking, but we also aren't too concerned about it. We feel good about things.

Been having the weirdest cravings lately...

I put this photo on Facebook to announce the nearing arrival of a new little sweetheart due March 27th. I'm 14 weeks today.  I've been sick and moody, and sick and moody, and sick and moody. My poor family.  I have thrown up more with this baby than any of the others. My record for throwing up in one day is 6 times. Usually I just feel horrible all day. I was happy that at least with this baby I would have good days mixed in with the bad. That helped to make it no so miserable. Finally outta the first trimester for the last time. Feels GREAT!

Scavenger Hunt

The boys have been no so patient about this "secret" I have been keeping from them! They have begged and begged for me to "just tell us!" But I stayed strong even though it was super tempting. I made a little scavenger hunt and hid them around the house to see if they could guess what the surprise was. I had them run all over the house to different rooms and find clues.

I think they were a little less than thrilled, party poopers. I think they were thinking, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, sooo about that puppy??" ;) And so it goes living with boys...so hard to get a reaction or any excitement out of them with these kinds of things.

I'm not a huge advocate of epidurals.

I mean if you want one by all means get one. I'm not the type of person to try and pressure anyone to not have one. I'm not a sadist or a masochist for that matter. I guess I just imagined the experience different when I thought about it with my first baby. It's not that I hated it. I just wasn't crazy about the way it made me feel. I felt anxious instead of at ease, and I hated not being able to move my body. I also didn't care for the fact that it seemed harder to breathe. I had dealt with some pretty intense contractions before receiving the shot so I felt like I had a pretty good gauge on what could be expected without an epidural. I should probably mention that with William's birth it was like the stork flew in the window, laid my baby gently in my lap and we cuddled! Absolutely perfect. Anyway, I knew if millions of women could give birth without an epidural than I could, but did I want to?? With that being said, I will definitely try my hardest to get to the hospital more than 50 minutes before my next baby is born.

I started having some extremely painful contractions around 3:30 a.m. on Sunday the 13th. Contractions never became regular and some hours I would have very few if any at all. They finally got regular at 6 and at 6:30 I knew it was time to go. We got to the hospital a little after 7. Mom called Patrick at 7:20 (he had to go to Smithville to get Tamiflu for William because we found out that day he had the flu and everyone in town had run out of it!) The nurses moved me into a room around 7:30. Patrick arrived after that. And at 7:51 Jack arrived. And a minute or two after that the anesthesiologist arrived. And a minute or two after that the doctor arrived.

Just so you can all know how not tough I am -- a few favorite quotes...
"I'm gonna die."
"Do I really have to wait for all those fluids before I can get an epidural?"
"Somebody please help me."
"I'm never doing this again."

I went through labor with a surgical mask on because of the flu threat. I felt like I was giving birth in the Sahara! They did test me again at some point during the labor and found out after delivery that I was flu free so I could hold my baby and I didn't even have to wear a mask! It was over and I was oh. so. happy.

Long Time Gone

And I ain't commin' back again - kidding...Time for a quick update.

Sunday, May 18th -Patrick was called to be Elders Quorum President. I felt a little bit like Sis. Hinckley when she found out Presdient Hinckley was called to be an Apostle - "You?" (Disclaimer - I have an amazing husband. It was just quite a shock).

I also got the news on said date that I would be released from my calling of 3 years (primary president). I was shocked by President Meredith's phone call and all that it entailed. So my obvious reaction? Tears - lots and lots of tears. Joy? Sadness? Horror? Could be any body's guess.

Wednesday, May 21st -Began implementing sign language with Will. First signs we are working on; "mommy," "daddy," "diaper," & "all done." We aren't too consistent as of yet. But we are trying to remember to use the signs when we speak to him. We are doing better.

Friday, May 23rd - Baby Food Day. I love making Will's baby food. It is quite possibly my favorite way to cook. So easy, and I'm pretty sure I can't screw it up too badly. Super cheap too!

Week of May 25th-30th - Spent preparing for my last primary activity - children's talent show. As always kids were adorable and fun to watch. We had quite the variety show - singing, dancing, magic tricks, poetry, swords, baton twirling, guitar pickin' cute kids! I'm gonna miss 'em.


Week of June 1st-7th - Teething, fussy, tired baby. Will now has 2 teeth that he so graciously reminds me of quite often. We are working on "It's not okay to bite, Mommy." I need a sign for that. Wonder if slapping counts? Kidding, KIDDING! seriously kidding.

Sunday, June 8th - Officially released from calling and it feels g-r-e-a-t! Miss the kiddos - most of them anyway- again, kidding -kind of :)

Well, I think those are pretty much the highlights...until next time....